Monday’s Thought Of The Day

An Old Man’s Perspective: Ten things to consider.

1. I’m not saying let’s go kill all the stupid people. I’m just
saying let’s remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.

2. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now.

3. You can tell a lot about a woman’s mood just by her hands. If
they are holding a gun, she’s probably mad.

4. Gone are the days when girls cooked like their mothers. Now
they drink like their fathers.

5. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like
someone you’ve just met? That’s common sense leaving your body.

6. I don’t like making plans for the day. Because then the word
“premeditated” gets thrown around in the courtroom.

7. I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes 1,500 days in a
row.

8. I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.

9. Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for
murderers: If you find one, what’s your plan?

10. Everyone has a right to be stupid. Politicians just abuse the
privilege.

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10 responses to “Monday’s Thought Of The Day

  1. Reblogged this on Bobbi's Blog and commented:
    Hilarious!

    Like

  2. Reblogged this on Flat Creek Rolling and commented:
    I know this is not Monday, but it is good for Thursday too.

    Like

  3. ha ha ha ha….thanks for the great laugh!!!

    Like

  4. Reblogged this on lucindalines and commented:
    This is so funny that James asked what was all the noise as I was laughing up stairs and he was down. The only thing I ask is which # was your favorite, please share.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Grin … Sad but true .. I think #9. I know far too many people that are paranoid that everyone they don’t know is out to do them harm. It must be a unbearable life to live in constant fear..

      Grin, time to mosey onto the porch for a nice cold adult beverage. Listen to the toads croaking, coyotes howling and that Jack donkey call out to the Jenny 2 miles down the road.

      Happy Gardening

      Like

  5. I laughed so hard my husband asked what was going on. I tried to pin this to Pinterest, but the computer wouldn’t let me. So sad because this really needs to be out there. In fact, if you don’t mind, I am reblogging it because my daughters and other readers really need to have this laugh today. I especially like #3. Thanks for the laugh!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. They’re good! Thanks!

    Like

  7. Thanks for the chuckles.

    Like

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